I grew up in a country where general elections were marked by violence and you could get shot just for wearing the wrong color clothing in the wrong area of town.  My mother and father were staunch supporters of opposing political parties and the loud, animated arguments would go on for hours, frequently deteriorating into accusations and name-calling.  Each government touted new vision and recycled old promises but very little would change, for better or worse; and the carousel went around and around.

The intensity of the angst and animosity aroused by our recent elections gave me cause for concern, though I for one am grateful that the war is primarily one of words, not bullets and I did not have to temporarily ban sections of my wardrobe in fear for my life. However, the inflammatory rhetoric, the broad labels, the deifying of individuals and political parties and demonizing of others compelled me to pray more fervently for our country than I ever have before.

When did we decide to allow our hopes and fears to rise or fall on the fate of any political party?  Why would we base our highest expectations on the good intentions of any human government, make enemies of people who do not see things the way we do, or choose ideological conflict over building community?

The Bible teaches that every government on earth, democratically elected or not, owes its existence to, and will be held accountable by God Himself.  The Babylonian empire ruled the world but its king Nebuchadnezzar was made to eat grass like an animal,

“…until you know that the Most High rules in the kingdom of men, and gives it to whomever He chooses.”  Daniel 4:32

In his letter to Christians living under oppressive Roman rule Paul wrote:

“…For there is no authority except from God, and the authorities that exist are appointed by God…” Romans 13:1

It is a hard pill to swallow that God, in accordance with His divine purpose, would allow evil people like Hitler, the Viet Cong or Idi Amin to be in positions of authority.  You can be sure that is one of the questions I will want answered when I see Jesus face to face.  What is clear now is that God requires those in authority to execute justice and righteousness, and there is a day of reckoning coming for all who abuse God-given authority.

Maybe when we seek hope for our nation and encouragement about our future we should not look to the capitols first, but in the trenches, among the people with ‘boots on the ground’.

Every day people fulfill their life-purpose serving the poor in our gospel missions, soup kitchens, food banks, etc.; faithfully doing their part to restore dignity, give hope and meet the practical needs of those who have fallen on hard times. Teenagers give up their unalienable right to sleep in on a Sunday morning to feed and clothe the poor, and “hope springs eternal” in my heart.

It springs again when the young pastor challenges 686 churches in one county to provide permanent, loving homes for the 686 children in foster care, telling them, “…these are our children!” , and people rise to the challenge.

It is found in those with the passion and determination to be teachers, who go into the profession and into the poorest of classrooms knowing they will never get rich doing this job, but they may influence and inspire some, who could change our nation and perhaps the world for good.

I see it in the people who have no time to debate or hurl insults over the issue of abortion because they are committed to come alongside that terrified young girl who feels she has made the biggest mistake of her life and is all alone, or the pregnant woman who just found out she has cancer and is facing no good options.  Without judgment or condemnation, they give unconditional love and practical support with compassion that cannot be legislated in the halls of government.

Then there are those men and women in law enforcement and our military, who truly find their purpose and calling in careers that are necessary to stem the tide of evil, but are required to put their lives on the line.  No matter who wins elections, they always answer the call to serve, knowing that one day they, and their families, may have to make the ultimate sacrifice for our safety and freedom.

I find hope among people who have refused the poison apple of greed; who work hard every day, are content to live within their means, and sacrifice to live debt-free so they can afford to give generously of their time and money to those who need a hand up.  They pay their taxes, invest their surplus and treat their employees fairly, not because they fear or favor the government, but because they fear God and acknowledge His favor.

So here’s the thing; our faith and hope for the future ought not to be in any government, but in God’s power, plan and purpose, which can never be thwarted, (Job 42:2), continuously being fulfilled in the lives of individuals.  No matter the outcome of any election, God did not stutter when He said:

“If My people who are called by My name will humble themselves and pray and seek My face, and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and heal their land.” 2 Chronicles 7:14

So, as one who has made the choice to be called by His name, I vote, God decides, I go to bed early election night and sleep like a baby, then wake the next morning to begin to pray continually for,

“…all who are in authority, that we may lead a quiet and peaceable life in all godliness and reverence, for this is good and acceptable in the sight of God our Savior who desires all men to be saved and to come to the knowledge of the truth.”  1Timothy 2:2-3

…just living the thing.

As we began our descent, the American Airlines pilot informed us passengers that the weather in San Francisco was clear, sunny and 58­˚C so, “they must be having a warm spell”, and that was the first clue that there was about to be a huge paradigm shift in my world. Whoever wrote, “The coldest winter I ever spent was a summer in San Francisco.”, could not have been more shocked than I was when that pilot used ‘58˚’ and ‘warm spell’ in the same sentence!

San Francisco was also the ‘classroom’ for another life-preserving lesson I had to learn very quickly.  Apparently, you cannot stare, then point at the girl with the purple hair, black lipstick, 12-inch mini-skirt, and 6-inch heels; you absolutely cannot ask her why she is dressed like that or where she is going; and you definitely cannot wonder out loud to your companions, why she chose to dress like that if she didn’t want attention. Epic faux pas!  I learned very quickly not to ask out loud every question which popped up in my crazy Jamaican head; hence my deepening insecurity issues and my dilemma with ‘Deer Crossing’ signs.

I was living in Castro Valley, and felt a little less homesick in the early spring when everything was lush and green.  Driving through the rolling hills surrounding LakeChabot, I could almost imagine I was back in Jamaica; except for the really nice roads and all those ‘Deer Crossing’ signs.  ‘The question’ popped into my head the first time I saw one, but I refused to ask it out loud since apparently, I could get into all kinds of trouble asking the wrong questions at the wrong time.

All this happened before “Google” was created, so I wrestled with the question burning in my brain for months; paying close attention and searching for clues, frustration building, until one day, without warning, it erupted:

“Aaahmmmm…I was wondering about those signs.  How do the deer know where to cross the road?”

I believe the hysterical laughter that followed…and continued for weeks afterward…may have caused the earthquake in ’89.

Back in those days I was still very insecure and a new immigrant desperately trying to fit into a new culture, so under the polite face mask, I was really hurt and embarrassed.  Everyone thought the question so ridiculous that there was a lot of guffawing, but for a long time no one even attempted to give me an answer.  They were not mean-spirited, but I found the insensitivity irritating and thought:

“Pshaw!  Typical ethno-centric Americans.  No wonder people in the rest of the world don’t like y’all.”

That was such an unfair assessment, but when you are new to any environment, you long for someone on the ‘inside’ to point you in the right direction, say a kind word, or take you under their wing; to be the difference between prolonged misery and a fairly smooth transition.  It is a hard thing to be the only one not ‘in the know’; to be the ‘new kid on the block’, the one on the outside of all the inside jokes, and not to have a single person be sensitive to your vulnerability or discomfort.

On the other hand, I also think outsiders are Jesus’ favorite kind of people.  His angelic birth announcement was made to shepherds; the lowest of the low on the socio-economic, religious, vocational, and every other kind of totem pole.  He irritated the religious movers and shakers who labeled Him, “…a glutton, and a drunkard; a friend of tax-collectors and sinners” (Luke 7:34). His response was unapologetic:

“…Those who are well have no need of a physician, but those who are sick.  God and learn what this means, ‘I desire mercy, not sacrifice.’ For I have come to call not the righteous but sinners.” (Matthew 9:13-14)

My favorite encounter in the Bible is the one between Jesus and Zacchaeus, the tax-collector; hated by the Roman government officials because he was a Jew, and hated by his fellow Jews because he collected taxes on behalf of their Roman oppressors.  Zacchaeus had become rich by overcharging his own people and skimming off a portion of their taxes for himself.

But even he was not immune to the notoriety that caused Jesus to draw huge crowds wherever He went, and being too short to see over the crowd, he climbed a tree to catch a glimpse of this Man who healed miraculously, fed thousands with five loaves of bread and a few fish, and silenced the condescending, self-righteous Pharisees with the power of His words. Jesus surprised everyone when He stopped under the tree saying,

“’Zacchaeus, make haste and come down, for today I must stay at your house.’  So he made haste and came down and received Him joyfully.” (Luke 19:5-6)

Jesus changed Zacchaeus’ life forever with a single act of kindness and acceptance, and I can imagine he almost fell out of that tree in shock and gratitude.  Outsiders already know they are a hot mess, and are much more willing to accept God’s unconditional love, forgiveness, and power to change their lives.

“Then Zacchaeus stood and said to the Lord, ‘Look, Lord, I give half of my goods to the poor; and if I have taken anything from anyone by false accusation, I restore fourfold.’ And Jesus said to him, ‘Today salvation has come t this house, because he also is a son of Abraham; for the Son of Man has come to seek and to save that which was lost.’” (Luke 19:9-10)

So here’s the thing, the “Deer Crossing” story is now a ‘classic’ in my circle of family and friends, and though I still maintain it was a legitimate question, I also know it was really funny! Having been an outsider, I hope I always remain sensitive to the plight of other outsiders in any environment.  Of all people, we followers of Jesus Christ should look to the example of the One who loved and accepted us when we were outsiders; always ready to extend grace and kindness with sincerity because we’re …just living the thing.

 To me celebrating birthdays is like getting a new stamp in your “Passport of Significance” as you cross each border; sweet sixteen, adult eighteen, legal-to-drink-alcohol twenty-one, threshold thirty, every decade following and the years in between.  Each year I commit to celebrating mine for the entire month of October, except on Halloween, and often have different events and outings planned with family and different circles of friends months in advance.

 The office where I worked usually celebrated birthdays with potlucks, and on my birthday I made sure the potluck was over the top!  One year I roasted a whole turkey and brought side dishes; another I baked a different cake every day for the entire week of my birthday, and each year I would make my ‘wish list’ of favorite potluck dishes known to all and sundry because as much I love to cook and bake, everyone knew it would be a win-win situation when their birthday came around.

I turned 50 years-old this past week without any of my usual fanfare or fireworks, and though I felt just as excited about this milestone birthday as I do every year, I deliberately chose not to instigate or plan any celebration.  Instead, it was time to face down the unhealthy combination of fear, insecurity and pride (portions may vary), that says, “If I don’t do it, nobody will”; more specifically, that no one would care enough to celebrate with me and I would find myself home alone watching Jeopardy on my 50^th birthday…no new stamp in my “Passport of Significance”.

That did not happen! Instead this birthday will forever remain in my memory as one of the most significant, deeply moving, liberating, and healing experiences of my life, not because of the number 50, but because of the gift God gave me from and through people in my life who cause my toughest challenges, bring my greatest reward, and are my only treasure in this life. 

There was the friend who found out I had nothing planned and on very short notice arranged for a group of friends to meet at a local restaurant for a delicious dinner, punctuated with lots of stories and laughter.  After dessert… and the game two World Series win by the San Francisco Giants baseball team…priorities…priorities,.. it was all business.  I listened with a full heart as each of these people, who had taken time out of their very busy lives to celebrate mine, prayed for a specific area of my life; children, work, relationships, and so on, and promised to continue to pray even after my birthday was over.  Unforgettable!

There were quite a few text messages wishing me a ‘Happy Birthday’ on ‘the day’, and forty-nine people posted birthday greetings on my Facebook timeline, but the first one to make me cry was from a young lady who was one of the teenagers I mentored when I was in my early twenties.

“What would I be today if God hadn’t planted stubborn discipleship leaders in my life like you?  I value the times we shared together. And I pray that as you continue to invest in the lives of those around you God would continue to invest more of Himself and ‘X’ amount ah (of) blessings and favor in your life and your loved ones… I know Michelle, Lavern and I were a handful!”

Affirmation!

Then yesterday my brother made me an awesome birthday brunch, complete with mimosas and my favorite fried plantains, and without any pomp or circumstance the final piece of the 50^th birthday puzzle fell into place. It was only last year that we reconnected after being out of touch for thirty-five years; eight of which he spent in a persistent search for me.  We have the same father but each grew up as the only child of different single mothers.  From our first three-hour conversation till today, the connection was deep and immediate, and our similarities are uncanny.   He is a super-smart, totally ‘chill’ version of me and an entirely different kind of stamp in my “Passport of Significance”. 

 For so much of my life I was never able to clearly identify or rectify the nagging, pervasive loneliness that would show up at the most unexpected times in my life; birthdays, Thanksgiving, Christmas,…no matter who I was with, the minute things got quiet, there it was; like a shroud. We had sat down to brunch with his family and my youngest daughter when the conversation turned to plans to celebrate Thanksgiving together, and suddenly it hit me…the shroud is gone; my heart suddenly feels whole and overflowing with gratitude.  Happy Birthday me!

 That hole in my heart that exacerbated my fear and insecurity has been completely repaired.  Indeed, God has given me the best 50^th birthday present; “far beyond what I could ask or imagine”.  He used different people, in different ways to fill the empty space, seal it and make the thing whole again, and now it is up to me to live like Paul:

 “…this one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the heavenly call of God in Christ Jesus” Philippians 3:13-14

 So, here’s the thing, I woke up on my 50^th birthday with this song in my head and it has become my anthem:

When I Think about the Lord,

How He saved me, how He raised me,
how He filled me, with the Holy Ghost.
How He healed me, to the uttermost.
When I Think about the Lord,
how He picked me up and turned me around,
how He placed my feet on solid ground
It makes me wanna shout,
Hallelujah,
Thank you JESUS,
LORD, you’re worthy, of all the glory, and all the honor,
and all the praise…

 So, if you come across me and I am humming it, singing it quietly or loudly, with hands raised and body swaying, just smile and nod; this “squirming concoction of misfit parts” has had a life-changing initiation into the Fabulous Fifties club and I’m still…just living the thing.

If you have never visited the Caribbean island of Jamaica, you have my permission to put that on your bucket list immediately. I may be a little biased since I spent the majority of my first twenty-five years of life on the island, but even after you factor in any ‘alleged’ bias; it is still one of the best places you could visit, especially if you go with a Jamaican, or go to visit a Jamaican.

Most tourists visit just for the WARM tropical climate, or the WARM, clearwaters of the Caribbean Sea, in brilliant shades of blues and greens, or the beautiful WARM beaches, stretching for miles of powdery white sand, or the perpetually lush, green vegetation, or delicious fast food sold in colorful, creatively-decorated shacks along roadsides; all of that you can find on a myriad of other tropical islands…well maybe not the food shacks…those are definitely unusual.

On your visit to Jamaica however, you must promise to make every effort to get to know the people, because it is very possible that after God made my people, He broke the mold…on purpose.

Recently I watched a documentary on the history of the slave trade and learned that ship captains headed to America would often drop off their most troublesome slaves on the island of Jamaica…hmmmmmm…you think?!  Jamaica had one of the highest instances of slave uprisings of any Caribbean island, and long before slavery was abolished throughout the British Empire, large numbers of slaves were continually escaping up into the mountainous interior of the island.  They established large, self-sufficient, and well-armed communities of people called Maroons, whose resourcefulness and guerilla- warfare tactics gave the British soldiers and plantation-owners fits!

Then, as now, Jamaicans are a fiercely independent people, who feel no compulsion to remain subservient to any status quo that at best makes no sense, or at worst is a travesty.  We are notoriously authentic, so what you see is what you get…at least 99.999% of the time. While we may have our own unique brand of mental health issues, they are rarely rooted in “hiding our true feelings”, “suffering in silence”, or “pretending to be someone I am not”. As a matter of fact, if you do not want to hear the truth about something; your life, friends, or an outfit you are wearing…do not ask a Jamaican.

When I moved to the United States just over twenty-four years, my culture shock had little to do with the way of life, the food, or even the weather at the beaches in northern California…(though I am still a little traumatized by that!).   Instead, it was primarily a reaction triggered when people were always so nice, so polite, and so friendly in the way they treated you…just before they stabbed you in the back.  The lack of authenticity so deeply ingrained in the way people behaved in almost every relationship, even among the Christians, made me confused, depressed and desperately homesick for my crazy, loud, cantankerous, but always ‘keeping it real’ Jamaican people.

Today I have dual citizenship because I love my adopted country as much as I love the island where I was born, and was excessively proud the day I watched my son take the oath to defend these United States of America, “from all enemies, foreign and domestic”, as a member of the Army National Guard. 

Over years I have met people born here who could move to Jamaica tomorrow and fit right in because they have the authenticity thing down pat.  However, I find that I still struggle to walk the fine line between an inherent desire to practice authenticity, and the reality that always ‘keeping it real’ is too often ineffective and counter-productive in this culture, to our detriment.

It is comforting that the word ‘truth’ is so frequently used to describe the character and essence of every member of the Godhead.  The Holy Spirit is described as “the Spirit of truth” (John 14:1, 15:26 and 16:13), Jesus is “full of grace and truth” (John 1:14) and told us He is “the Way, the Truth and the Life” (John 14:6), and Moses wrote about God, the Father,

“He is the Rock, His work is perfect; for all His ways are justice; a God of truth and without injustice; righteous and upright is He.”  Deuteronomy 32:4 (italics mine)

The Bible itself is irrefutable evidence that God ‘keeps it real’, because if His intention was solely to win our acceptance and approval, He would have left out things that ‘god-wannabes’ might find offensive, and ‘fudged’ the truth on some things He left in there. 

In his letter to the church in Ephesus, Paul was adamant that unity, growth and maturity in relationships among Christians begin with “speaking the truth in love” (Ephesians 4:15)

“Therefore, rejecting all falsity, and being done now with it, let everyone express the truth with his neighbor, for we are all parts of one body and members of one another” Ephesians 4:25, Amplified Bible

So here’s the thing, practicing authenticity is risky and takes courage, but where there is not authenticity, there is not love…certainly not the kind of love we need to survive and thrive in Christian community. 

“Rather, let our lives lovingly express truth (in all things, speaking truly, dealing truly, living truly).  Enfolded in love, let us grow up in every way and in all things unto Him Who is the Head, (even) Christ (the Messiah, the Anointed One).  Ephesians 4: 15 Amplified Bible.

In her book, “The Gifts of Imperfection”, Brené Brown quotes E. E. Cummings:

“To be nobody-but-yourself in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make you everybody but yourself – means to fight the hardest battle which any human can fight – and never stop fighting.”

So go ahead; start planning your trip to Jamaica, and every day of life have the courage to show up and be real; make the conscious choice to practice authenticity and …just keep living the thing.

The other day we found an old photograph of my now 23 year-old daughter and her now 24 year-old boyfriend playing in the dirt together back when they were 4 and 5 years old respectively.  Everybody say….”Awwwwwwww!” Since then we have found a few more childhood pictures of them together and, should they ever end up getting married, we will have the coolest pictures ever to show at the reception!

Of course, the nostalgia generated by that first picture sent us searching through all our old pictures, resulting in an evening of unexpected entertainment consisting mainly of hysterical laughter at old hairstyles and clothes, shrieks of “Get rid of that!”, at the toothless smiles and awkwardness of elementary school years, and the usual “Oooo’s”, and “Awww’s” that baby pictures inevitably generate. 

Just so you know, most of our pictures are in one huge plastic bin; not in snazzy Creative Memories photo books, not in cutesy scrapbooks or even old-fashioned photo albums; nope, they are all in a huge plastic bin with a blue lid that I bought on sale, at Target. I know, I ought to be ashamed, but I can explain.

You see the plastic bin full of pictures is part of my retirement plan; that, and my intention to become all of the Golden Girls rolled into one spitfire of an old lady, living in a warm tropical climate somewhere.  I plan to be wise and rational like Dorothy, as caring and loving as Rose, to dress like Blanche…no elastic-waist polyester pants for me, and like Sophia I will say the most outrageous things, just to keep life interesting for everybody. 

Then during the hours when my old body needs to rest so it can catch up with my active, fast-paced retirement life, I am going to bust out the plastic bin with the blue lid, bask in the memories, creatively organize the pictures and take the advice of Charles Hamilton Aïdé, to:

“… pray for wisdom yet; for calmness to remember, or courage to forget.”

An interesting things about memories is that, just like the pictures in the plastic bin, some are true treasures; parts of our history that ought to be preserved and cherished, while others are flotsam and jetsam; also part of our history, but inherently useless and unproductive that just need to be thrown away or set aside while we get on with the business of life. Wisdom gives us the ability to differentiate between the two.

Do you ever wonder why it is so easy to forget the good memories from our past, but the ones that cause so much hurt and pain refuse to just shut up and go away?  And, why is it so hard to define ourselves by memories of good experiences we have had, but so much easier to let memories of horrible things said and done in the past define and direct our present and future? 

The good news is that this is one of those rare situations where the answer to that “Why?” is not very important; what is important is that we have the power to choose which memories we will keep and use, and which ones we will refuse to put in the scrapbook we are creating today.

The Bible is full of examples of the ying and yang of remembering and forgetting.  When Moses led the Israelites out of Egypt after about 400 years of slavery, he told them,

“Remember this day on which you came out of Egypt, out of the house of slavery, because the Lord brought you out from there by strength of hand…” Exodus 13:3

They should have listened to him, because the journey that should have taken about 11 days took 40 years, because they repeatedly forgot the things they were supposed to remember, and remembered the things they were supposed to forget.

Over in the New Testament Paul talked about his life:

“…this one thing I do; forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the heavenly call of God in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 3:13-14

And Paul is one who knew the importance of remembering and forgetting because his past was littered with ignorance, arrogance, and murder.  In fact, when he was still called Saul, he stood by holding the coats of the men who stoned Stephen to death, just because he believed in Jesus. How many times do you think that memory came back to haunt Paul as over and over he preached the same gospel for which Stephen had been stoned to death.

Paul went on to become the most effective evangelist, and defender of Christianity this world has ever known because of his ability to forget the horrible memories of his complicity in the murder and persecution of Christians. He chose instead to remember his life-changing encounter with Jesus Himself on the Damascus road, which set Paul on an entirely new path to fulfill his true calling and purpose.

So, here’s the thing, when memories come knocking at you door do yourself a favor and take a look through the peephole first.  If they are the ones that come to condemn: to destroy your faith, crush your hope and leave you too crippled with hurt, guilt and fear to take another step into your future, do not open the door and invite them in for tea and a chat!  No!  Lock the door, turn the deadbolt, slide the chain into place and ignore the knocking till they go away.  This is not the time to be hospitable and entertaining. 

If however, the memories knocking on your door are the ones that encourage and strengthen you, restore your confidence and feed your faith and trust in God, do invite those ones in to sit awhile and reminisce.  They will provide exactly what you need to rise from where you may have fallen, to strap on your armor and courageously take the next step on your journey; to… just live the thing.

Nicholas Negroponte is a man with an amazing dream to put a free laptop in the hands of every child, even in the most remote and impoverished regions of the world. His dream began in the remote village of Reaksmy, Cambodia with its dirt roads, no electricity or running water and 40 miles from the nearest town.  His family had built a school, provided a solar-powered satellite, and given every child a free laptop so they could access the worldwide web.  Soon there was absolutely nothing else going on that was as cool as school.

Back in the United States, Nicholas took a leave of absence from his job as a professor at MIT and founded the non-profit organization, One Laptop Per Child, (OLPC).  His team of engineers and programmers set about designing and producing a laptop that was simple to use, powerful, and sturdy enough stand up to conditions in Third World countries; the result was a computer revolution called the XO; a seriously powerful laptop, impervious to dirt, sand, or water damage.

It appeals to children everywhere because it looks like a toy, with cute little ‘ears’ which are really radio antennas that give it two or three times the Wi-Fi range of most laptops. Batteries provide ten to twelve hours of use and can be recharged with a hand crank, and the screen can be viewed outdoors in full daylight.  You could be in a hut in Timbuktu and as long as there is a solar-powered satellite receiver somewhere in that region, you would be able to access live coverage of any event, going on anytime, anywhere in the world.

So there I was watching this heart-warming story on an episode of 60 Minutes, and getting all emotional about “illuminating the lives of children and their families”.  In some remote areas, the light from the screen on these laptops was often the only light in the house, and because of them, entire villages now had access to life-altering information, learning opportunities, and hope for a better life for their children.

Suddenly, without warning I felt a kind of jolt in my brain, as if something had clicked into place, so strongly I was scrambling to find my Bible so I could look up a story of another man who had a dream about the future, while he was exiled on an island called Patmos.  His entire dream is recounted in the book of Revelation, but I was looking for something specific.

In the beginning of his book John writes:

“Behold, He is coming with clouds, and every eye will see Him, even they who pierced Him.  And all the tribes of the earth will mourn because of Him…”  Revelation 1:7 (Italics mine)

As clear as day, over nineteen hundred years ago, this disciple of Jesus Christ, describes an event where every person in the entire world, “in all the tribes of the earth”, would be able to view in real time, something happening thousands of miles away from their spot on the planet, even in Reaksmy, Cambodia.

Such a thing was not possible when my mother was born and not even conceivable when my grandparents, or great-grandparents were born, yet John saw it. His prophecy appeared implausible and even impossible for hundreds of years, until the invention of satellites, receivers, computers, and now laptops that can be powered with a hand crank.  Once again, science and technology was playing catch-up with the Bible. 

So there I sat watching Nicholas Negroponte who, it is very possible, has never even read the book of Revelation in all his life, describe his own dream, and his determination to see it come to pass. 

“The human mind plans the way, but the LORD directs the steps.”  Proverbs 16:9

Whether Mr. Negroponte knew it or not, his dream fit perfectly within John’s dream; a prophetic revelation he received about things that would happen towards the end of time.  John was experiencing what was perhaps the loneliest and most discouraging time of his life; most of his friends had been tortured and killed, and he had been boiled in oil and then exiled on this barren island, so he was having a baaaaaaad day, week, year even, and had every reason to doubt all he had seen, heard, and believed.  Then, on one of those very bad days he heard that familiar voice he knew so very well say,

“Do not be afraid; I am the First and the Last.  I am He who lives, and was dead, and behold, I am alive forevermore. Amen. And I have the keys of Hades and of Death.  Write the things which you have seen, and the things which are, and the things which will take place after this.”  Revelation 1:17-19

The revelation John was about to receive would blow his mind and ours, as he saw things coming in the future which he had no way to describe.  For example, how would he describe Negroponte’s computer if he saw one in his dream, and when he writes about ‘locusts’ made of iron that had “tails like scorpions and there were stings in their tails”, (Revelation 9:9-10), is it possible he was trying to describe an Apache Attack helicopter?  Poor guy! Nevertheless, you can be sure that when the dream was over and he set about writing down what he had seen, he wrote with renewed confidence, renewed hope and new confirmation of the truth he believed.

So here’s the thing, well, there are two things.  First, God does not lie, so everything John saw and wrote down will come to pass, whether it seems impossible or not, whether we believe it or not, and whether we like it or not.

“…no purpose of Yours can be withheld from you.” Job 42:2

Second, dream your God-given dreams without fear or favor.  Don’t let loneliness or discouragement stop you from hearing the voice of One who is “alive forevermore”.  Embrace your purpose with confident hope and… just live the thing.

Is it just me or do you also feel your self-esteem go down a notch whenever that snooty chick in our navigation system says in the most condescending voice ever:

“Recalculating route, (you idiot!).” 

I hear the words in parentheses implied in her tone every time!  But no matter how velvet-smooth her voice, there is still no speech, language, or dialect where an almost ninety-degree turn should be described as a ‘slight right’ (heifer!)…word in parentheses implied in my tone.  Two can play that game.

Navigation system hostility aside however, I must admit that there are times when I deeply empathize with anyone faced with the frustration of giving someone specific directions to somewhere you know well, and they refuse to listen or follow your directions.   One of these days there is going to be an official disease, researched and  reported in the New England Journal of Medicine called, ‘will-not-ask-for-or-follow-directions-itis’! 

Some sufferers from this disease are the people who will ask you for directions, not do anything you tell them to do, end up where they have no business being, and then insist that you to give them new directions to get them out of the predicament they chose to be in, to the place where they are supposed to be.  God bless them…because I want to hurt them…until the truth hits me…wait, I’ve done that.

“Trust God from the bottom of your heart, don’t try to figure out everything on your own.  Listen for God’s voice in everything you do, everywhere you go; He’s the One who will keep you on track.”  Proverbs 3:5-6 The Message Bible.

How many times have I read those words, but allowed pride, fear or lack of discipline to keep me from doing what it says?  And, as much as I like the Carrie Underwood song it sounds to me as if Jesus does not want to take the wheel.  No, I think we’re the ones in the driver’s seat, and He wants to navigate; giving us the directions that will get us to our destination safely.  We can follow the directions or ignore them; we drive, we choose.

His directions sometimes appear out-dated, irrelevant, or ‘just not going to work in my situation’. He could not possibly have foreseen the science, technology and culture of the 21^st century, could He?  And, how can His directions compete with the opinions of those movers and shakers who shape modern culture and thought?   Or is it possible that my particular challenges and problems are soooooooo unique that the One who made me unique cannot possibly figure out the way I ought to go?  

Truth is, He does know it all and we are the ones always playing catch-up; John wrote “every eye will see Him’ (Revelation 1:7), long before the invention of television or satellites.  He is all-powerful and His purposes cannot be thwarted; against centuries of public opinion Ezekiel wrote that Israel would become a nation again two thousand, five hundred and twenty years before it happened on May 14, 1948 (Ezekiel 37:11-14). And, He knows you better than anyone else, including you, so would you ask somebody who builds push-carts how or where to drive your Mercedes Benz? Hmmmmm?

My biggest problem following directions is how easily I get distracted.  There was that one time driving a very familiar route to southern California that I missed the exit to the 210 East because I was ‘rocking out’ to Beyonce’s “Single Ladies”; my daughter still brings that up every time we drive down. Also, I find the combination of sale prices and my collection of coupons to be extremely distracting; and it took me waaaaay longer than necessary to get gas the other day because there was a TV screen in the gas pump!  

It is not easy to find direction for life in the busyness and clamor of ordinary days, or to carve out time away from the ‘noise’ of household duties, electronic devices, well-intentioned people, and undisciplined thoughts to read, to pray, and to listen on purpose.   But the greatest reward for this deliberate choice to listen is that no matter how far off course we may be, there is never an irritated, condescending or snooty voice making us feel condemned for missing the right turn, or taking a wrong one. 

“…I will lead them in paths they have not known.  I will make darkness light before them, and crooked places straight.  These things I will do for them and not forsake them.”  Isaiah 42:16

In the interest of full disclosure, I must also admit there have been the times when I was following God’s directions as best as I knew how but was convinced He was trying to get me killed!  I was broke, broken-down, broken-hearted, and facing broke-my-back mountains of failure, and hopelessness.  Then ‘out of the blue’ help would come to provide for every need; and later when I looked back with the clarity of hindsight, I would see the lessons learned and be able to face the next challenges fortified by increased faith, hope and confidence in His love because,

“He makes me lie down in green pastures; He leads me beside still waters; He restores my soul.  He leads me in right paths…”  Psalm 23:2-3

So here’s the thing, you get one shot at this life and you can trust God to navigate you successfully through it.  You have to be willing to follow His directions, and not allow yourself to be distracted by people who are of no help to you on this journey or by things that have no eternal value.  And when the way gets hard, and you find yourself exhausted and about to lose heart, then my friend be confident that you are growing exponentially, and expect that eventually He will direct you to sanctuary.  It is your life and you get to drive so strap in, adjust your ‘mirrors’ so you can see the way clearly, listen to your Navigator, put it in drive…and just live the thing.

Sharon is a clinical psychologist whom I have known for over thirty-seven years, and a “post-it note” friend; a group so small in number that all their names would fit on a post-it note.  They are the people I know I can trust; who love me unconditionally, and wholeheartedly, and will always tell me the truth, liberally seasoned with grace, even when it is hard or costs them dearly to do it.

My friend took on the role of counselor during one of the darkest period of my life, when the only things that kept me going were my three children, and a stubborn belief that God is not a liar.  We lived over three thousand miles apart in those pre-Skype days, but phone calls and emails helped to erase the distance as I desperately clung to her encouragement and advice like a life raft, among the floating debris that remained of my life, until…

One day I was complaining about the latest injustice that I felt made me a ‘victim’ yet again, when after a long pause Sharon said to me,

“Annie, the truth is, we have the life we choose.”

Whaaaaaaa….t?!  Is that the kind of nonsense her psychology training had taught her to say at a time like this?  I was thinking somebody should burn that text book!  But Sharon has long since proved herself to be a true and loyal friend, who lovingly tells me the truth I need to hear, to get me to confront whatever is wrong inside of me; to treat the disease, not just the symptoms.  That is the kind of person everyone needs to be a post-it note friend, and why I think that song “Jesus, Friend of Sinners” should really be,  “Jesus, Post-it Note Friend of Sinners Like Me”!

Once, He was visiting the home of His friend Lazarus, who lived with his sisters Martha and Mary.  As the older sister, Martha took on the role of hostess and during the visit and was busy with all the work of entertaining.  Been there, done that!  Plan the meal in advance and do all the food shopping. Deep-clean the house and put fresh towels put in the guest bathroom. Cooking and baking, setting a perfect table, making sure everybody was served, that the food was kept warm and on and on.  All this work was going on in the house while Mary was sitting at Jesus’ feet listening intently as if the dinner was going to serve itself.

When Martha could not take it any longer she complained to Jesus, basically telling Him  that He really should make Mary come help her.  Jesus’ response was kind, but directed to the heart of the matter,

“Martha, Martha, you are worried and distracted by many things; there is need of only one thing.  Mary has chosen the better part, which will not be taken away from her.”  Luke 10:41-42

That is what He said, but what I hear Him saying is,

“Martha, sweetie, you know I love you, but Mary not helping you is the least of your problems.  You are letting so many things worry and distract you, when you really need to do only one thing.  Stop all your busyness, and just listen to me so you can get the answers you need. The work can wait, and if or when you do get back to it, your heart will be at peace.  Mary knows this instinctively and has chosen wisely, and I am not going to tell her to do anything different.”

Ouch!  Martha was not doing anything wrong by being a good hostess, and her request for help from Mary was legitimate, but her real problem was the crippling fear and anxiety she had allowed to take over her life, which Jesus wanted to replace with peace.

How easy it is to see circumstances and/or other people as both cause and effect of all that is wrong with me, especially if there is even the smallest crumb of legitimacy in the claim, which of course there always is because neither our lives nor the people in it will ever be perfect.  With such imperfection so readily available we can go through our entire lives without ever looking inward for the source or our discontent, and continually explain away or excuse our unhealthy behavior even while professing a desire to be better.  The only cure is a generous dose of undiluted truth, carefully administered with grace and love.

On another day Jesus stopped by the bed of a man who had been sick for thirty-eight years and asked him a question,

“Do you want to be made well?”  John 5:6

Doesn’t that just beg for a sarcastic answer?  “Duh!”  or “Why would you think that?”  or “No, I’m just here for the fresh air.”  It is only as you read the rest of the story, that you understand why the question Jesus asked him was very necessary.

The man was a complainer, always blaming somebody, and always had an excuse for everything. Truth be told being sick was working well enough for him, and if he got better he would actually have to take responsibility for his life and behavior, losing his ‘victim’ identity.  By the time Jesus gets around to telling him,

“See, you have been made well!  Do not sin any more, so that nothing worse happens to you.”  John 5:14,

…we begin to realize that his wrongdoing, not his physical sickness, was at the root of his problems.

So, here’s the thing, trials may come over which you have absolutely no control, but you absolutely control how you respond, and the choices you make.  You do have the life you choose. Resist the temptation to excuse yourself or lay blame at the feet of other people or your circumstances.  You have at least one post-it note Friend in Jesus who truly loves you, and His words are the truth you need to hear, not the fluff you want to hear.  Do what is right, not only what is easy, and….just live the thing.

“If it’s okay with you, I am going to anoint you with oil, and then we will pray for you; but I won’t let the oil get in your hair, because I know; never touch a black woman’s hair or get it wet with anything!”  Chuck Wilsey, Senior Pastor, Wellspring Christian Center.

That, my friends, is what ‘phileo’, true brotherly love looks like when you are heartbroken, discouraged and struggling to find direction; when everything that can go wrong seems to decide that this would be a good time to synchronize watches; when you need somebody to just care about you and assure you that “every lickle ting, is gonna be awright”, not because Bob Marley said so, but because God is always with you and willing to help you; and especially when you need Jesus to show up with skin on.

More than two thousand years ago Jesus left His followers with a promise to encourage them when life left them discouraged and filled with despair :

“Let not your heart be troubled; you believe in God, believe also in Me. In my Father’s house are many mansions; if it were not so I would have told you.  I go to prepare a place for you.  And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and receive you to Myself; that where I am, there you may be also.” John 14:1-3

Then He left.

Now you and I have seen what Ty Pennington and the team from Extreme Makeover House Edition can build in seven days, and the Bible says God created heaven and earth in seven days, so can you imagine what kind of place Jesus could be building that has taken two thousand plus years already?

“Eye has not seen, nor ear heard, nor have entered into the heart of man the thing which God has prepared for those who love Him”  I Corinthians 2:9

And before anyone is tempted to snicker and label this another ‘pie in the sky when you die’ cultic myth, let us remind ourselves again that ninety eight percent of Biblical prophecy has already happened, exactly as prophesied, so I wouldn’t snicker too much or bet good money  against the remaining two percent also proving to be true.

Meanwhile, we who believe Jesus are left here to live out the number of our days on planet earth without  seeing Him in the flesh, but because He promised that He would never leave us or forsake us, He sent the Holy Spirit, the Comforter, ‘another of the same kind’ (John 14;16).  It is just as if Jesus Himself came back again at Pentecost, but this time in the form of a Spirit, who would come to live inside every believer; a concept much like Churchill’s riddle, wrapped in a mystery, inside of an enigma. God is walking on our planet again, but this time, the only skin He is using to touch the lives of other people, is ours.  That is what people who call themselves followers of Jesus Christ should be like, Jesus with skin on.

Of course that is so much easier said than done.  Jesus was so different, even from the religious people, so counter-culture, so radical, so authentic in His expression of love and compassion, and so perfect!  How is it even possible that Perfection could live in the mess that is our humanness, much less continuously purify, transform, shape and polish it, till He can see Himself in the reflection in the mirror that is our life?

“Remember, our message is not about ourselves; we’re proclaiming Jesus Christ, the Master.  All we are is messengers, errand runners from Jesus for you.  It started when God said, ‘Light up the darkness!’, and our lives filled up with light as we saw and understood God in the face of Christ, all bright and beautiful.  If you only look at us, you might well miss the brightness.  We carry this precious message around in unadorned clay pots of our ordinary lives.  That’s to prevent anyone from confusing God’s incomparable power with us.  As it is, there’s not much chance of that.  You know for yourselves that we’re not much to look at.”  2 Corinthians 4:5-7 The Message

The same writer also summarizes the mystery of it this way,

“…Christ in you, the hope of glory (an accurate representation or reflection of the nature, essence, and character of God). “ Colossisans 1:27b

Mere mortals, living ordinary yet extra-ordinary lives, and carrying around in them the power and the presence of God, with the ability to reach out to people who need to know that God is, that He loves perfectly and unconditionally, that he has not abandoned humanity, but has paid the ultimate price to free us from prisons of hopelessness and despair, to rescue from all that enslaves, and that He is preparing a place for us to be with Him forever.

“The Spirit of God, the Master is on me because God has anointed me.  He sent me to preach good news to the poor, heal the heartbroken, announce freedom to all captives, pardon all prisoners.  God sent me to announce the year of his grace, a celebration of God’s destruction of our enemies, and to comfort all who mourn…” Isaiah 61:1-2 The Message

And so it is that you come across people who you know are followers of Jesus Christ and you don’t see hypocrisy, you see authenticity, you don’t see demanding or self-centered behavior, you see genuine care and compassion for others, you don’t see perfection…yet, but you see them always striving to do the right thing, even when it costs them dearly.  They do things like anoint you with oil to pray for you, but are careful not to get the oil in your hair, because they paid attention enough to know better; in that moment when you need  to know God loves and cares for you, they become Jesus with skin on…just living the thing.

It is 2:30 on a Friday afternoon and I am racing…I mean, driving a little quickly, from Modesto to Sacramento in busy afternoon traffic. I had to get to the Military Entrance Processing Station (MEPS) where, at 4:30 that afternoon, my son, my only son, was being sworn into service with the United States Army National Guard. At a time when our nation was fighting wars on three fronts, my boy was choosing to enlist  voluntarily! This, after he had already been accepted to a perfectly good college in North Carolina with scholarships! How did we get here?!

Well, he was a quiet child…no, seriously, he really was quiet, and shy, with an amazingly long attention span, even as a toddler.  The boy would play with his Lincoln Logs, and watch movies with his dog Sparky, and you would not hear a peep out of him for hours.  How, you ask, did he go from being that quiet, shy child, to being a soldier?!  Well, I was asking God the saaaaame thing!

 He was in eighth grade when he decided he would join the Junior Reserve Officer Training Corp, (JROTC), in his freshman year of high school. He excelled at JROTC for all four years of high school, moving up through the ranks and earning all kinds of accolades.  This was truly his “natural bent” and he had found his niche at a crucial time in his teenage years. 

I remember sitting at one ceremony where he was receiving some very distinguished lifetime award, and I did not even know what the award was or what it meant.  I think I was just in denial, and waiting for him to get over this whole army thing.   He didn’t.

 His senior year of high school he came to talk to me about his plans for the future and began the conversation with,

 “Now mom, don’t be mad…”

 What kind of a way is that to start a conversation about anybody’s future?!  I felt seven more gray hairs pop out of my head in an instant.  He goes on to tell me he planned to delay going to college, to train to become a combat medic, an angel of the battlefield, with the Army National Guard; and… he… is… excited!  I had never seen him this animated about anything that required excessive exertion of mind, or body, unless JROTC was involved.  So, here he was, enthusiasm bubbling though his sentences, and excitement practically coming out his pores.  I, on the other hand, felt like I was about to experience a full-blown, off-the-charts, panic attack.

 One thing emerges with startling clarity as I look back; that I instantly remembered a story in the Bible about God calling to Abraham one day, and giving him the following instruction,

 “Take now your son, your only son Isaac, whom you love, and go to the land of Moriah, and offer him there as a burnt offering…” Genesis 22:2

 Scripture does not record Abraham responding with anything but obedience, but he and I are not all that close. Can I be honest with you for a minute and tell you I was looking at my son, but in my heart I was asking God

 “What have You done?!”

 Nevertheless, some strange person, who sounded exactly like me, responded to my son with affirmation and encouragement.  The ‘traitor’ in me told him that all those times when I said my greatest desire for him was to become all that God had meant for him to be, no matter what that was, that I really meant it.  I would never be disappointed with my son as long as he loved God with all his heart and followed His purpose, no matter how scary that purpose was for his mother.  And so with no warning, and without any pomp or circumstance, my little kitchen in Ripon, California was transformed into Abraham’s “land of Moriah”.

 I have come to believe that we all walk the hill to Abraham’s Mount Moriah experience at one time or the other;  especially if we are truly serious about having an authentic, active and vibrant relationship with the Living God. One day you will be in the middle of  some gray-hair-producing situation, and with startling clarity you will realize that your belief in the One True God is being tested right then, at that moment. First, you will not be alone; God will be right there, with the peace and strength you will need survive and thrive.

 “…I will pray the Father, and He will give you another Advocate, to be with you forever – the Spirit of truth…He abides with you and will be in you.” John 14:16,17

Also, in that moment you get to choose what to believe and how to act.   I believe God loves my son even more that I could ever love him, and so I choose to face my fears with faith and trust that “God’s got him”.

 Three years later my son remains active in military service and cannot wait to be sent to the battlefield.  Each time he is put on standby to deploy, I make the journey back to my own Mount Moriah again.  I am considering becoming a tour guide; have a little souvenir stand; sell t-shirts and postcards. 

So here’s the thing, I have imagined every horrific possibility that comes with having my only son choose to become a soldier and go off to war, but still, this extraordinary peace remains.  Life on planet earth was not the beginning of all things and it is not the end of all things.  No matter what happens to my boy as he serves in the United States Army National Guard, God Himself will be with him, and with me.  

 “…for I know in whom I have believed and am persuaded that He is able to keep what I have committed to Him until that Day.”  2 Timothy 1:12

 Meantime, I pray, I trust, I still keep trying to learn that crazy phonetic alphabet army moms are supposed to know, and I…just live the thing.